Rant

Did I ever mention on this blog that I hate Long Island, and more specifically, I hate Port Washington? On a daily basis I am besieged by hostile, horrible, ill-mannered, loud, driving-impaired Long Islanders. Evil, horrible people.

Another nail in the coffin of my ashtanga practice:

I go to the Port Washington LIRR parking office. In order to obtain a Port Washington parking sticker (you must have a sticker to park in the LIRR lot on weekdays), you must have a driver's license, auto registration and rental agreement or utility bill, all with a matching address in your name. So I went out and got said driver's license and registration (no picnic in NY state, mind you). Now, I am not on our rental lease, as we are in BF's apartment that he rented before I moved here. And I am not listed on the utility bills. So, being the thorough, well-prepared girl scout that I usually am, I called ahead to find out if there was anything I could do. And I was told to bring a bank statement or credit card statement, anything with a matching address.

So I went on my lunch hour to the parking office. I brought a savings account statement, a credit card statement, my tax return and my (hard-won) license and registration. The man behind the counter said oh, a new permit, you'll need to wait for 'her'. Whoever the fuck 'her' is. OK. I maintain my sunny disposition, because, as I see it, being nice will get you much farther and it's usually easier anyway. 'She' comes to the counter. I give her a sunny 'hello' which is completely and rudely ignored. The man explains to her that I want a new permit but I don't have a lease or utility bill.

Her: You don't have a lease?
Me: I'm not on the lease here but I live here
Her: You don't have a utility bill?
Me: They aren't in my name.
Her (with evil, stony look): Well whose name are they in?
Me: (silently WTF). Well, they are in blankety blank's name.
Her: Well who is blankety blank?
Me: (silently again WTF?). He's the other person that lives in the house.
Her: These won't do, this is a savings account statement. You'll need a checking account statement (me wondering what's the difference at this point). Or a cell phone bill. Do you have a cell phone bill?
Me: (silently...was I supposed to bring every fucking bill I've ever received at this address?????). OK, I'll get that and come back.

No 'sorry for the inconvenience', no 'I know this is a pain in the rear but we have to weed out the fakers'. Not even a 'kiss my ass'. She just turned and walked away.

So I walked out to my car and had a mini-meltdown, wondering why the FUCK I live here and why the FUCK people on Long Island have to be so fucking stupid and rude. I got in my car and of course, on my way back to work some driving-impaired Long Islander almost sideswipes me in the process of trying to cut me off to get to a parking spot on the street.

The funny part? I'm only getting a parking sticker so I can park at the train station when I go to work in the city. And I'm only wanting to go to work in the city so I can go to a fucking yoga class. I MUST be out of my mind.